Running from the Shame of Abuse 🏃🏽‍♀️💨

  • Observe the circumstances that are happening to you (You must notice that the relationship is abusive and toxic to your health)
  • Beware of evil (Be Aware of the evil around you. Be cautious and alert of those you surround yourself with KNOW YOUR ENEMIES)
  • Do not be ashamed if something concerns your soul. (If something worries you; makes you anxious especially if you have a reasonable reason as to why you feel the way you do don’t dismiss those feelings.)
  • For these is a shame that bringeth sin; and there is a shame which is glory and grace. (A person’s shame can lead them down a path of sin which can turn into varies addictions to mask the pain of the shame that they feel. Or the shame that they feel can lead them to turn to Christ and taking up their cross shedding their old man and going against everything that they were taught.)

Someone who has been abused knows what it’s like to want to run away. Wanting to run away from the toxicity. Wanting to leave the toxic environment to escape the pain that they feel.

In the beginning an individual often runs from the shame of the abuse they suffered. I know I used to run I lived in denial, and I felt that maybe my mother did love me but just in her own “special” way. When you run from shame you will look towards other things to soothe your pain (drugs, alcohol, sex, food etc.)

But when you run towards Yahweh with your shame, He will give you beauty for your ashes. Only He can give you glory and grace working in us and making us a new creature that turns pain into praise because He will never leave us nor forsaken us.

(Isaiah 61:3 – To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.)

And once this happens you will become a living and breathing testimony of deliverance for El Shaddai. Your pain will be transformed into praise. Your pain will become power that can and will be used against your enemies.

That is where the enemy knows the real power of redemption lies in our testimonies of YAHWEHS FAITHFULLNESS AND LOVINGKINDNESS. We are the proof of His love and His healing. Therefore, the enemy aims to keep you shame-faced and downtrodden. Shame can either bring you defeat, or you can use it to your advantage to move forward to have a deeper and loving relationship with The Highest.

The more your around toxic people the less you see El Shaddai’s plan for your life. The less you see His plan for your life the more you lean on outside forces that contribute to you adding more shame to the shame you already feel. Losing sight of your true purpose in this life. What Yah has called you to do.

This is why our Savior told us in John 10:10- The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

Yahweh wants us to have life, and to have it more abundantly. We must realize that the abuse inflicted on us was not our fault the environment we were in was sick in order for one to properly heal they must leave the environment where they first became sick. Shedding off the old man, and becoming a new creation in Christ.

Asking Christ to be your Lord and Savior takes away the shame of the abuse that was afflicted on you along with the weight and burdens of the pain you feel. Repentance plays a HUGE role in healing. The closer we get to Christ the more that we realize that He alone is our saving grace, and that nothing can separate us from His love and that when our mother and father forsaken us He will take us in. Only Yahweh can turn a broken person whole! Ask me how I know? Listen to my testimony on surviving abuse. Tell me if you can relate. 🙇🏽‍♀️

Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSU-iSYmXfqemLdgGTFj1ng

Thank you for reading! May Christ Bless you and Keep You always

Dedee ❤

Witness Wednesday: Faith Vs. Fear🛡

Proverbs 14:8

There is so much hype going on in the world right now with the COVID-19 many people are panicking and many people think that it’s not that serious. Grocery stores are flooded, lots of people are on edge lots of people are out of work not knowing if they have a job to go back to, after this “blows over”. So much going on it makes me wonder what has happened to man that leads them not to have faith in God? What makes them put faith in a job, or a government system? Does anybody believe that El Shaddai is bigger than a virus? Why are people so worried? Why are people panicking? Shouldn’t this be a time to build up faith rather than fear that is what the enemy wants a world full of FEAR so that he can maneuver silently without being stopped or hindered.

By faith Noah, being warned of God of things not seen as yet, moved with fear, prepared an ark to the saving of his house; by the which he condemned the world, and became heir of the righteousness which is by faith. (Hebrews 11:7 kjv)

Fear can be healthy, or it can be UNHEALTHY. Healthy fear keeps you dependent on God no matter what circumstances you face, no matter how many people are reported to have the virus. It protects believers from pride and being over self-sufficient (especially in a time like this), it causes us to not become selfish but to instead focus on others so that we can be a light amongst the darkness giving hope to those who feel as though they have no hope in a dark world plagued by COVID-19. Healthy fear makes us stand on God’s promises and His word it also causes us to know that He is in CONTROL no matter what goes on around us or what fiery darts the enemy throws at us as believers we must understand that “Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world” (1 John 4:4 kjv).

Why panic? Why worry? Why have fear? NONE of these are of God! They are tools that come from the devil and his minions. Unhealthy fear leads into mistrust, anxiety, dread, panic, worry, and the worst of it all DISBELIEF it causes you not to believe in El Shaddai but yourself, and your own strength it causes you to put yourself in the position of God(which is impossible). “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.( 2 Timothy 1:7 kjv). Everything is beyond our control. So why not put our faith in the One who controls it all? Why not praise Him while everyone is panicking. WE ARE NOT OF THE WORLD! Children of the world have no HOPE but we have HOPE our blessed hope is in Christ Jesus who died on the cross for our sins. Fear comes from the enemy, but faith moves mountains it stops the enemy’s reign of terror and puts out the fiery darts that he throws at you instead it leads to us as believers holding up our shield of FAITH stopping the devil right in his tracks.

Stand strong my beloved, and strengthen those who feel fear with the Word of God! Instill hope in them through Jesus Christ standing on His Word, and looking to God’s promises. Rejoice not in darkness but rebel in truth take heed during these times that NO MAN or devil deceives you HOLD UP YOUR SHIELD OF FAITH AND TAKE BACK YOUR MIND. Just think for a minute my beautiful people during this time while you are home with your loved ones get a piece of paper out and write down all the blessings that God has given you, and all the vices he has DELIVERED you from the more you write the more you should let it sink in that with man it is impossible, but with God ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.

Have a beautiful blessed day. I love you All! God is way bigger than we can ascertain I’m sure of this. ❤

Why I changed my number, and how He changed my thought process 🕊️💝

It finally set in, they don’t know me; they don’t know us victims of narcissistic abuse normally walk around with a rain cloud over their heads. They live life like an ostrich with its head in the sand (they ignore and hide from obvious signs of danger small or large). Like oil sticks to your hands even after you wash them over and over again, so does the wounds from abuse they prick your heart like a thorn on a rose, and it damages you the same it damages spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. Victims are normally plagued by these demons long after the abuse has stopped(or they went No Contact with no closure) they often detach from their surroundings, and more than often they feel like they can’t tell their closest friends,spouses(or anybody) about the symptoms that has plagued their thought processes throughout the years even if the abuse is long over.

“The aftermath of abuse leaves you feeling alone, and isolated the victim often feels like no one will understand them or ever love them for them.”

But I’m assuming your asking yourself (I thought she was talking about her changing her number, or didn’t she say she was telling us why she changed her damn cellphone number?) Let me reiterate, they don’t know me, they never knew me, and they don’t deserve to get the chance to know me one thing the Most High Yah help me realize on my healing journey that He so mercifully sent me on is my abusers/enablers/flying monkeys/abuser supporters don’t know me(the real Dee). They also don’t know you, just sit down for a moment and think about it they only know a false image projected onto you, it’s funny now that I think about it. I told my FM sister (three years before I finally got fed with the Narc family structure) that she didn’t know me… she kept implying, insisting, and ranting that she did all the while she had a glazed, dazed, and confused look on her face. A couple of things that the Lord has put in my spirit is “Just because you grow up in the same household as these people doesn’t mean that they know you they would like to THINK they know you.

SAME HERE TOO

When the stark reality hits you that you are a victim of narcissistic abuse, or any type of abuse in reality you shouldn’t be sad, hurt, or angry. He said “Rejoice!” Rejoice because your abusers knew, and seen you were strongest out the bunch not led captive by their web of deceit they seen you as the one who could break their mirror of deception, and fight the lies that they want to imprint in your mind and spirit. Not being casted into a spell of wickedness, but rather escape to walk onto that narrow path of RIGHTEOUSNESS. He whispered into my heart (my mind my spirit)”They seen the purity in your soul Dee, the unquenchable zeal in your eyes Dee, and they heard the courage beating from your pure heart”. Your abusers are so envious that they couldn’t obtain the very traits that the Most High blessed you with from birth, they couldn’t rob you of it, so they wanted to blind you of it. Luckily, the Most High shall exalt us above our abuse.

1 Peter 5:6-7

Stay Humble, Be healed, ACCEPT His Happiness! Because Yahweh Shammah cares for us!

-Glory be to God

I changed my number, because I’m tired of the lies they tell me, I’m tired of pretending everything is okay, and they didn’t hurt me. I’m tired of seeing blocked calls come up from abusers, and enablers who just want to barge into my life to control it and to patronize me. I’m SICK of seeing fake text messages as if they really care about me. It wont ever be the same, and oddly enough they know that, but I don’t give a damn if they DO OR DON’T because I know it wont be the same I’m not the same person anymore. The same little girl who accepted abuse, and pushed her own feelings,and emotions into a garbage can. Now I’m child of the Most High, a wife, and a mother how did the Lord change my thought process you may wonder? He helped me understand that all they want to do is STEAL from us, STEAL our happiness, STEAL our healing, STEAL our families that the Most High gave us. They want to KILL the new man, and bring back the old one who tolerated their abuse. But isn’t there a scripture for this scenario?…….

“Yeah we are OVERCOMERS”

Thank you so much for reading my blog, May the Most High bless you on your path to healing, and recovery. Be Blessed. Until we talk again next time.

-Dee🙏🏾