I can’t believe it’s been 2 years on my blog! Praise The Most High God in Heaven!! When I started my blog two years ago I never thought that I would have stuck with it for so long I have grown to love blogging, and telling my story of healing from abuse as a child. It is so funny how much can be accomplished when you decide to put it in the hands of The Most High when you decide to trust Christ and move forward in His will and His Light and love.
I am more than a CONQUEROR! I don’t just say this but I believe it also. Yahweh encourages me so I will encourage you. He loves me so I love you too. Thank you for following my Blog and being apart of this journey may Yah bless you and guide you in Christ name I pray. Amen 🙏🏽
Observe the circumstances that are happening to you (You must notice that the relationship is abusive and toxic to your health)
Beware of evil (Be Aware of the evil around you. Be cautious and alert of those you surround yourself with KNOW YOUR ENEMIES)
Do not be ashamed if something concerns your soul. (If something worries you; makes you anxious especially if you have a reasonable reason as to why you feel the way you do don’t dismiss those feelings.)
For these is a shame that bringeth sin; and there is a shame which is glory and grace. (A person’s shame can lead them down a path of sin which can turn into varies addictions to mask the pain of the shame that they feel. Or the shame that they feel can lead them to turn to Christ and taking up their cross shedding their old man and going against everything that they were taught.)
Someone who has been abused knows what it’s like to want to run away. Wanting to run away from the toxicity. Wanting to leave the toxic environment to escape the pain that they feel.
In the beginning an individual often runs from the shame of the abuse they suffered. I know I used to run I lived in denial, and I felt that maybe my mother did love me but just in her own “special” way. When you run from shame you will look towards other things to soothe your pain (drugs, alcohol, sex, food etc.)
But when you run towards Yahweh with your shame, He will give you beauty for your ashes. Only He can give you glory and grace working in us and making us a new creature that turns pain into praise because He will never leave us nor forsaken us.
(Isaiah 61:3 – To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.)
And once this happens you will become a living and breathing testimony of deliverance for El Shaddai. Your pain will be transformed into praise. Your pain will become power that can and will be used against your enemies.
That is where the enemy knows the real power of redemption lies in our testimonies of YAHWEHS FAITHFULLNESS AND LOVINGKINDNESS. We are the proof of His love and His healing. Therefore, the enemy aims to keep you shame-faced and downtrodden. Shame can either bring you defeat, or you can use it to your advantage to move forward to have a deeper and loving relationship with The Highest.
The more your around toxic people the less you see El Shaddai’s plan for your life. The less you see His plan for your life the more you lean on outside forces that contribute to you adding more shame to the shame you already feel. Losing sight of your true purpose in this life. What Yah has called you to do.
This is why our Savior told us in John 10:10- The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
Yahweh wants us to have life, and to have it more abundantly. We must realize that the abuse inflicted on us was not our fault the environment we were in was sick in order for one to properly heal they must leave the environment where they first became sick. Shedding off the old man, and becoming a new creation in Christ.
Asking Christ to be your Lord and Savior takes away the shame of the abuse that was afflicted on you along with the weight and burdens of the pain you feel. Repentance plays a HUGE role in healing. The closer we get to Christ the more that we realize that He alone is our saving grace, and that nothing can separate us from His love and that when our mother and father forsaken us He will take us in. Only Yahweh can turn a broken person whole! Ask me how I know? Listen to my testimony on surviving abuse. Tell me if you can relate. 🙇🏽♀️
Growing up in an abusive household sometimes can be a blessing or a curse depending on how you look at it. At first I looked at it like a curse but now I look at it as a blessing. In life we have choices and with free will comes a chance to make a difference in one’s life. I’m not perfect, and I never really claimed to be nor do I pretend to be. Growing up like I did I realized that my mother didn’t prepare me for a lot of what the world has to offer.
I’m saying that to say this I wasn’t ready for all the things that this dark world threw at me. I wasn’t prepared for the workplace drama, and the confusion. How they try to silence you for being you. How they slander you. How they rob you. How they add unnecessary stress to you. No I wasn’t prepared it boggles my mind how people are, and how selfish we as humans have become you go to these jobs just for a check but isn’t life more than that?
Didn’t The Most High God put us here for more? We aren’t corporate slaves. Contrary to popular belief the customer isn’t always right. We live in a society where people are so consumed with themselves that they never take the time out to analyze anything. They are quick to try to get someone fired without trying to understand the dynamics behind someone’s behavior.
hmm… I’m getting tired of the fiasco. Tired of the games. Tired of the scrutiny. Just tired of it all. It’s so sad how people are so quick to take someone’s livelihood without losing sleep over it.
I’m done caring what people think. Most people don’t even have balanced scales. The workplace is saturated with demonic activity, and people who are weighed down with demons. Most customers aren’t even humans.
They are aiming to snuff out your LIGHT! They are wise in their approach to you. Be careful and guard your hearts and mind. I’m choosing to trust The Most High in everything no matter how good, or bad it may seem. He will make straight my paths, and that’s all that matters.
Proverbs 29:25 kjvThefearofman bringeth asnare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe
Growing up in the type of home I grew up in a lot of things were out of order.The way God was represented was out of order instead of Him being displayed as loving and caring He was used as a tool for my abusive, and narcissistic mother. Looking back on my childhood I thought that my mother was right, and in the back of my mind I felt that she knew what she was doing I figured that maybe God did hate me and I was doomed to perish. This thinking lead me to a life of confusion, and darkness quickly flooded in growing up I was robbed of my self-worth and my self-esteem this lead to fast-paced living. You see when I was 17 my mother in one of her fits kicked me out on the streets I ended up at a homeless shelter then I was living pillar to post.
I experienced a lot when I was homeless, and was exposed to a lot that I wasn’t ready for this includes: drug use, alcoholism, violence, and fast paced sex. You know all those things the world tells you is “okay” I did these things because I was looking for something or maybe someone to love me it really is true that a child is shaped by their environment, and how you affirm them either destroys them or builds them up. It leads them toward a path of destruction or a path of victory. The devil knew what he was doing I had been attacked since I was a small girl the first time my mother beat me the breaking process started, and it just kept going downhill ever since.
One thing I have learned about Yahweh is that He is merciful and He takes care of us even when we aren’t even aware of how much darkness we are in or apart of. Only Jesus Christ can RESTORE us. Jesus Christ has delivered me from a life of drug use, alcoholism, porn addiction, masturbation, homosexuality, lying, fornication, adultery. To be honest everything that Galatians 5:19-21 tells us is a WORK OF THE FLESH you see me DEDEE I am NOT PERFECT I HAVE SINNED and I will most likely sin again this is why we must repent daily because we all fall short of the glory of God. His Word says “There is no one righteous, not even one (Romans 3:10).
If you don’t trust in Jesus, then who is your trust in?
If you don’t have hope in God, then who do you hope in?
Did you know in 2017 862,320 babies were ABORTED? Do you know God will JUDGE this Abominable thing!!! DO YOU KNOW GOD HATES HANDS THAT SHED INNOCENT BLOOD?? DO YOU KNOW THESE BABIES BLOOD CRIES OUT FOR JUSTICE???!!! DID YOU KNOW 42.4 MILLION BABIES WERE KILLED BY ABORTION IN 2019??? WHERES THE OUTRAGE OVER THIS??!!!
Yes, COVID is here but is your house in order? Are you seeking God like you should? Who can restore you? JESUS CHRIST. Who can save us? JESUS CHRIST. Who can redeem us? JESUS CHRIST. That is who I am leaning on! Not Trump, not the government, not this fallen world I place My HOPE IN EL SHADDAI!
Proverbs 29:25 kjv Thefearofman bringeth asnare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe
Time is running out folks. If you haven’t accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior I suggest and highly recommend you too. Repent today, open your heart to Him. He is waiting for you with open arms He wants to be your strong tower He does not wish for any man to perish. He redeemed me and He can redeem you too. IF you LET Him. You do not want to be left unprotected during the tribulation May God have mercy on us all.
Food for thought: You are either getting closer to Christ or you are far away from Christ. The good news is that God can forgive you for your sins just ask for forgiveness with a remorseful heart. May God Bless You. Amen ❤👑😇
In this day and age I can see that we are in the end of days. Many people do not wanna acknowledge this but even a person who is not walking in the light can see that something sinister is in the air. People are becoming more narcissistic, and the demons that plaque them they are unleashing upon others.
I meet a lot of people. And one things we all have in common is that we all feel that something is on the horizon. This can be good for some, or bad for others one thing that I try to hold onto is my faith in Jesus Christ.
That’s all you really can do is trust in the Lord. Many people don’t believe but that will not stop His promises nor will it hinder His arrival. I long for you Jesus, to be in Your Divine presence.
This world is getting worst, and if you cant see that maybe your part of the problem and not the solution.
Jesus is coming soon. The mark is coming soon. Famine and wars are coming. Where do you stand? Who do you believe in? Do you have a strong foundation in Christ??
God’s power will be seen all over the world. So whether you believe or not, you will see HIM. May God bless you all and give you Divine strength during these trying times we are close.
Thank you for allowing me to see another year on this earth. I do not understand your plans for me but I do understand that if I am still here it is for a reason and for Your divine purposes. Life is hard and sometimes it is scary but I thank You Lord that I have You! You are a Good Shepherd and You look after and protects what’s Yours. Lord I pray that my life is filled with Your goodness and Your kindness and Divine Favor in Jesus Christ name I pray, Amen 🥰🥰😇👑👸🏽👰🏽
After three years of no contact I can honestly say that I feel the anointing of God’s healing power on me I can stand on my own two feet and I know it’s not my strength but Christ. Three years ago when I first went no contact I had just gotten out of a mental hospital undergoing demonic attacks I felt alone, scared, and I was tired of feeling the pain that came from me having my mother in my life. When I first cut communication it was like my mind was trying so desperately to manipulate me into believing that the abuse never happened, then I would have feelings of regret and loneliness. Instead of me acknowledging and accepting that I was abandoned, and abused by my family I would feel as though I was doing to them the very same things they had done to me. I would reverse it. It’s funny how we as humans can do that, it was like I was detoxing from a drug or coming down from a potent high.
Why do victims feel this way? How come after walking from an abusive situation, they feel the need to go back thinking things will change? The answer lies in our childhood one must acknowledge that the environment they grew up in was unnatural the only thing that would make sense is doing things that make no sense. Narcissistic parents train scapegoated children from a early age to cut ties with their original selves, they then mold them to be the physical manifestation of the pain, and anger that they feel on the inside. When the picked party lashes out at the treatment that’s inflicted on them the whole family stares “in shock”, and amazement. They are the only brave ones willing to fight on the battlefield this causes the narcissistic parent(abuser) to always seek out ways to keep the picked party “in their place” by using mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical abuse measures.
Things the Victim (Victor) should reflect upon while going no contact:
You have been brainwashed into believing that you are the reason why you are being abused and treated unfairly.
To not feel pain after going no contact the victor needs to understand that they need healing and to have successful healing they must leave the toxic environment completely.
If they cannot leave the toxic environment the victor must start renewing their minds with what the Word of God says about them, and who they are. They must also understand that the narcissistic parent is spiritually sick.
Realize that what the abuser says about you doesn’t define you, it just shows that the abuser is intimidated by you.
They will rise because they are HEALED BY GOD, they are victors leading other victims free! CALL ON YAHWEH RAPHA TO HEAL YOU!
FIND YOUR PASSION AFTER THE PAIN OF GOING NO CONTACT!