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I believe that we all come to a point in our lives where we have to let go of certain individuals. You have to make solid decisions based off of what’s best for you. I firmly believe that everyone isn’t suppose to stay in your life some people stay for seasons, and some remain for decades. Yahweh knows who belongs in your life who needs to stay, and who needs to leave it’s just up to us to know the difference. It’s been awhile since I posted a blog I been busy sifting through my thoughts, and trying to get my emotions in check so much going on. Everything has a time, and a place whether it’s switching jobs, moving to another state, or letting go of family members that you have outgrown. As a survivor I am learning many lessons the one lesson that was hardest for me to learn is that many people are a part of my history, but not my DESTINY. At this point in my life I understand that letting go doesn’t mean that you hate someone it simply means that your are going in a different direction than them you love them enough to let them venture on their own path. Letting go can be simple, or complex depending on the level of love in a relationship.
Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?
Sometimes we just love people so much that we realize they are safer in our history taking from them everything that we learned the good, the bad, and the ugly. Understanding that they simply do not fit in our lives anymore the purpose that El Shaddai had for them in your life has ran it’s course. Letting go gives you a renewed sense of self as we grow we much get rid of everything, and everyone that either weighs us down or whoever is going in an opposite direction than we are. Truth divides. Remember that high school friend that moved away? What about that ex that cheated? For me letting go involved family members some abusive, and some I just simply outgrew. I had to understand that they are part of my history, but not my destiny I cried for some, and disassociated from others. The growing process hurts sometimes, but in the end we must all realize that this is apart of The Most High God’s plan for us.
Romans 8:28 – And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
About three weeks ago I finally understood this lesson of letting go. I seen my estranged older sister (on my mother’s side) my heart raced, but I felt a sense of strength I wasn’t scared or anxious nor did I feel any hate or resentment towards her. We talked about our lives, and what all we had going on I expressed how I just needed time away from them time to see where I wanted to be she told me that she understood. I asked her about mama, and she said that she hasn’t changed (which didn’t surprise me) I even asked my sister if she talks about me, and my sister told me that my mama doesn’t bring me up (at least not to her). Upon hearing that I told my sister how I felt that mother and I both did things wrong, and the way we handled the situations that occurred could have been better it was just so hard for me to deal with her. Now that I’m older I realized that my mother was a broken woman who also suffered from trauma, and instead of her facing her demons she just dismissed them, and pushed them on me labeling me her “problem child” weighing me down with not only her problems but also problems of my own which robbed me of my sense of self.
I told her that I wasn’t ready to reach out to mama yet, and honestly I don’t think I ever will (I didn’t tell her that though).She replied that it’s okay, just don’t wait too long or you may regret it. My sister gave me her number which I took, but then I had another decision to make do I keep her number or delete it? Do I let them back into my life, or do I leave that door closed that I already closed so long ago? I decided on that day that I will leave that door close, and I deleted her number I then set out on a journey the journey of letting go of all the people who I felt that I outgrew the people who had no room in my destiny. I’m not mad at them I just understand that we are moving in two different directions. We are on two different levels. We want different things out of life. Growing can be uncomfortable, but at the same time when one grows they obtain a new level of understanding.
That day I discovered that I had changed. That I did let go not only did I let go of family members, but also others who I outgrew they are part of my history, and my history helped shaped me into the woman I am today. No one is promised to stay in our lives, but the only one who promises to remain there is El Shaddai; The God of Israel; The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. I cut off my family, and I understand now that I finally outgrew them and the pain they gave me. There is no hate in my decision if anything I feel a sense of peace, love, and completion.
Deuteronomy 31:8 – KJV It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.
I hope you open your heart to this. Some people are just part of your history, but not your destiny. You don’t hate them you just understand that they don’t fit on the road that you are walking on, or perhaps they are walking in an opposite direction than you. Either way do you know who belongs in your life and who doesn’t? Perhaps you are holding on to dead relationships that have run their course ask Yah to reveal who belongs in your life and who needs to go.
Everyone doesn’t fit in our destiny.
P.S It’s the hardest lesson to learn.